Thursday, 8 March 2018

What I hope for you #internationalwomensday

I know it was only yesterday that I wrote a letter to my daughter, but that was for her birthday, and this is different. In case it has escaped your notice, it's International Women's Day today, which has prompted to me to write down what I hope for my daughter. I was going to title it 'what I wish for you', but a wish didn't seem strong enough, so I'm opting with hope instead, as I do have hope that it can happen.

petals in hands

You're only seven, and I have so many hopes and dreams for you.
I will be happy with whatever you choose to be, as long as you are true to yourself.

There are things I hope for you as you grow older, and I wanted to mention them today, on International Women's Day, to hopefully show you how much times have changed.

I hope that you are not bullied at school, be it online or in person. I was bullied for being too thin, which is as ridiculous as it sounds. One day I was also taken to a room by my best friends, who all proceeded to tell me what a horrible person I was and why they wouldn't be my friends any more. I was also told I was stupid by my teacher, which impacted on my for most of my life.

I hope that you will find your tribe. It took me until I became a mother to really have female friends, to realise how powerful and supportive women can be. I'm hopeful that you will find a group of female friends who lift you up and make you the best you can be.


I hope that you leave school into an equal society, one where you can enter any profession you choose, one where you earn the same as your peers, irrelevant of their sex.

I hope you do not encounter sexism at work, but please know that this is still a problem now. I have experienced it countless times, from the boss when I was a 17 year old temp who graphically explained the ways in which he had sex with his girlfriend, when I was clearly not comfortable with the conversation, and too scared to speak up in case I lost the job. There were the times a newsreader would message me through the internal BBC system during his news bulletins to tell me I was "blossoming", I was 19 and he was much older. I was even fired for having a miscarriage before you and your brother were born. Don't get me wrong, I have worked in all male environments and experienced none of this, I'm not man-bashing at all, just pointing out that this kind of sexism has happened to me, and I'm not THAT old!

I hope you meet someone as wonderful as your daddy. Someone who believes in equality and isn't scared by the fact that you earn more than them. Someone who accepts responsibility for jobs in the house and is able to help out whenever they can. Someone who is your equal, and treats you like one.

I hope that workmen will not explain things to your husband until he looks at them blankly and says 'you really need to speak to my wife about this as I have no idea what you're talking about' (I love him so much for this)!


I hope that if you experience any of these forms of sexism that you will speak out.

I hope you keep questioning. Seeking adequate answers.

I hope you will fight for injustice, supporting others who are not as fortunate as you.

I hope you are supported by your friends, and by your family.

I hope you never feel inferior because you are a girl or a woman.

I hope you never feel that there is something you cannot do because of your sex.

I hope you realise you are amazing, and that your confidence shines through.

I hope for a fairer future for you.


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