The other day, as I was driving to pick my son up from the childminder, I saw a Mum I know at the traffic lights waiting to cross the road. Her middle child was playing up and she pushed him roughly back into his pushchair and shouted at him. There was a small part of me that was pleased about this. Obviously not because she was shouting at her child, but because for once, she showed that she is normal.
She has three children under four and has always come across as a Mum who has everything under control and one who has very well behaved children. She doesn't know that I saw her and I wouldn't tell her because she would be embarrassed.
However, it is so refreshing to realise that we all have moments when we're tired or having a rubbish day when we break from our mould and behave in a way we would normally not do. When my daughter was nearly a week old I properly shouted at my two year old son for the first time. I felt so utterly guilty when he cried and I know it was my fault but I was going through a really tough time with a week old daughter, no sleep, medications for her and breastfeeding problems. Looking back, he got the chicken pox spots about three days later so he probably wasn't feeling great either. Ever since then, on the occasions I have wanted to raise my voice, I have sucked it back in and carried on as if he wasn't being a pain in the arse. Maybe he is tired, or having a bad day, or just struggling with emotions that he is just learning to understand.
So, don't beat yourself up. Take a deep breath and start again. We are all human and we make mistakes. Being a parent is tough enough without us beating ourselves up about it.
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