Asking for help

Knowing when to ask for help with parenting is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.
Admitting that you can't cope.
That you've run out of ideas.
That nothing you are trying is working.

Parenting is tough.


This is a topic I haven't written about on my blog. I felt a little ashamed in all honesty that I couldn't handle it.

Last summer I reached breaking point. Since February 2015, my daughter's behaviour had been deteriorating. She is strong willed at the best of times, but she had started to really lash out. She was insolent and rude. The hardest thing was that she was being aggressive. Biting, hitting and kicking. Mainly me, but sometimes her brother and my husband.

She seemed to know what she was doing was wrong, but didn't know how to stop herself. I was concerned, and it hurt, both mentally and physically.

During the summer holidays in 2016 I reached breaking point. I realised that I didn't need to be scared about asking for help. In fact, if I wanted to get help, I absolutely had to ask if I wanted some.

karate yellow belt

So I did. I asked for help.
And that was the beginning of finding my little girl again.
It's not been the easiest road.
She's had a case worker visiting her in school and helping her to deal with her emotions.
We signed her up for karate, to help with self-discipline.
We watched her thrive.
From white belt to yellow belt in nine months, and the next belt on the horizon.
I am so, so proud of her.

Beaver sleepover

This summer was so much better than last year. We had a great time together. She still gets angry, but she knows how to calm herself down. She apologises when she has shouted or screamed. The aggression is largely gone. 

She has been for a night away from home with Beavers, which I wouldn't have dreamed of letting her do before. Most importantly, she now has friends. Children who want to spend time with her, rather than those who are scared of her.

I am amazed by the girl that she has become.

Journey through life

If you are struggling with parenting, then you don't need to be ashamed or worried about asking for help. My GP and school nurse team were wonderful. They didn't judge me. They helped me, and they helped my daughter.

Whatever journey is ahead for this wonderful little girl, I'll be there for her.